Tuesday, September 14, 2010

The Office



Today at work, our co-worker Joel went outside to talk on the phone, and saw a praying mantis. It was his first time. For seriously ten minutes, our whole department filtered in and out of the office to go look at it. Jessica looked them up on Wikipedia. I even found my supervisor out in the parking lot, after tracking her down with a question about paperwork. They stood there, discussing how amazing it was, how they’d never seen one before, how it looks just like a stick….

Joel: Aren’t they poisonous?

Me: No. Not to humans… or anything else. They’re not friendly, though, to other insects, especially females to males. After they copulate, the female bites the males head off.

Silence.

Without a word, all of them turned and went back inside. Mantis FTW.

I think everything in the office is funny only because it’s an office. And seriously funny: today, Nate the IT guy was eating a kiwi and got the juice in his lunchbox and I literally laughed out loud. I fill up my water bottle at the water cooler. I sat in the break room to eat my lunch. I’m getting file folders dropped onto my desk and being asked to load them into the system. It feels more like a comedy and less like my life, and I think that’s good for me, because I don’t think I’m capable of taking it seriously any other way. I don’t care about hot leads or negotiations, and if my job depended on my dedication to the business it would all be over, but the irony of my cubicle will sustain me indefinitely. Also: shopping for business clothes.

I like working near Kyle. I was (stupidly) afraid of working with him, afraid of wanting to compete and the consequences of an awkward rivalry. But we’re doing very different things and having him a few cubicles away makes work feel less lonely. We can appreciate the same weird things that happen and the same stupid things that people say. It’s good to share. I think I’m about to start learning a lot more about myself, about what I’m good at, what I’m afraid of, and why it’s all okay.

Those are all the coherent thoughts I have right now. Everything is still fresh and exciting and I can’t keep it all together. This life is ridiculous. Love you all.



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